How to deal with a worrying partner

RelationshipHow to deal with a worrying partner


Life partners who are aged or have mid-life crises or suffer from any underlying mental health issues often are found to be quite overprotective and possessive towards their better halves or romantic partners. There are several reasons behind the way partners behave with their spouses. But as they say, your partner is completely yours – however, he or she is, you own them and their problems as well. If you have a quite worried partner who keeps track of your whereabouts every now and then, here are some tips. 

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1) Inform them in advance:

If your partner gets excited or anxious when you leave her on a weekend at home without telling them where you are headed, then you are wrong in some way. Considering he or she will feel lonely or may also have to cook for dinner or lunch, or has other priorities in life than just waiting for your homecoming. So, it is better you tell your partner in advance about your plan to visit a friend or take a solo trip, the tentative location, and also if you plan to return late, what he or she can do for themselves and sleep off. Don’t keep things hidden as this is one of the root causes of constant arguments among couples.

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2) Ask them to calm themselves down:

Whenever your partner starts ringing your phone asking you if you had tea or snacks or lunch, etc., and what time you will be back home or whether you are with someone or alone, help your partner to hit the PAUSE button. You can be frank with your partner about how his or her constant need for staying updated about your whereabouts is making you feel like a prisoner. But there is a way of saying this thing to your partner. You need to encourage your partner to calm herself or himself down when you are away from them and reframe their thoughts in doing something else in life. Help your partner to get to know themselves by engaging themselves in a hobby class or meeting some friends or disconnecting from you for a while.

3) Practice relaxation techniques:

There is a way that makes a person living with us realize that they are different and need some form of relaxation techniques to be followed. If you practice meditation, yoga or writing therapy, or any other art form, help your partner also to follow the same. For example, when Riyona was staying back at home looking after her kids, she used to feel nervous when her partner didn’t turn up for the whole day and also didn’t call her. However, knowing her nervous and anxious nature, her husband joined yoga classes weekly once along with Riyona, and helped her distract her mind to some extent apart from the household chores. This helped Riyona also take interest in relaxation techniques such as meditation, and talk therapies with friends and thus, reduce her possessiveness toward her husband.

Finally, don’t play the victim card, and also don’t make your partner victimized by your carelessness. Some partners need constant care and attention and if your partner has been trained and brought up that way, then don’t expect him or her to change for you all of a sudden. Introduce changes slowly and be a part of your partner’s transformation in life.

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