Marital abuse is one of the biggest traumas in one’s life. Be it a man or a woman when they don’t enjoy marital bliss, they get into the habit of developing negative and depressing thoughts in their life. This leads them to take irrational decisions in their personal and professional lives. Any sort of marital abuse also affects a person’s confidence thus, not allowing him to have meaningful and long-lasting relationships with others.
Here is how you can use the technique of forgiving yourself to heal from the problems of marital abuse.
1) Just let things go:
Let the bad memories of the bad past you had with your husband or wife – GO. Go means release those negative memories from your mind by either sharing them with a friend or writing them down in a journal. With each memory that you write down, ask sorry to yourself for behaving in a certain way. You may be right or wrong as a partner or a human being. But the decision to feel guilty about behaving or speaking in a particular way because you were put into an abusive situation, won’t go on its own. You need to keep apologizing to your inner self for not having the courage to speak up or not having the patience to listen. Probably if you would have reacted in a different way, your marital problems wouldn’t have increased so much. However, that is past and you need to remove all those bad memories by forgiving your inner self one day at a time.
When sex becomes boring in your marital life
2) Write a love letter to yourself:
Once you have decided to forgive yourself, your inner self that is broken due to all the heated arguments and traumatic troubles that came your way in the marriage will appear. You need to heal your inner self by being soft with it and trying to give as much love as you can so that the broken heart can heal in its natural course of time. Writing a love letter to yourself should include your achievements, appreciating yourself the way you are, and also accepting your flaws and weaknesses without feeling regret or guilt.
3) Forgive your partner for the way he or she is:
This is the most challenging part of dealing with marital abuse. You may hate your partner for putting you in so much trouble and giving you so many challenges in leading a peaceful marital life. You may also have feelings of resentment, hidden anger, and a lot of misunderstandings about your partner that may never allow your ego or pride to accept your partner for the way he or she is. But you know what, the more you let go of your partner’s flaws considering he or she is also a human being and forgive your partner’s misdeeds, the lighter you will feel from within. Whether your partner and you will reconcile or not, is a different question, but when you apologize to yourself on your partner’s behalf and also give the forgiveness, you will eventually feel good and start leading a fresh life in the due course of time.
